Childhood Trauma Isn't Always Obvious

Childhood trauma often involves more than overt abuse or life-threatening situations. According to Anusha Dandekar, witnessing a parent's constant people-pleasing can lead to internalized patterns. Psychologist Rasshi Gurnani explains that this vicarious learning can cause children to equate love with self-neglect or believe their worth depends on pleasing others.

This subtle form of relational trauma can manifest in adults through chronic guilt, anxiety, and difficulty expressing needs. These behaviors, often unrecognized, can lead to codependency or perfectionism, eroding self-esteem. Therapy, including CBT and inner child work, helps individuals challenge these ingrained beliefs.

Breaking free involves recognizing these learned behaviors and setting boundaries. Techniques such as assertiveness training and self-compassion build resilience. Surrounding oneself with supportive relationships further reinforces healthier relational patterns, promoting emotional well-being and authentic self-expression.